i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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