dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
