Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
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