theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
