Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
