i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
