Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
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