Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Randomize
