Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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