What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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