I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
