i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
