IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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