I can tuck mytits in my pants
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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