Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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