...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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