So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize