I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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