Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
