Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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