Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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