i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
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