Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
