Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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