I want to have your abortion
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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