I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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