come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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