So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Randomize
