just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
