is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
