drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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