"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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