I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
