I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
