Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
