So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
