Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Randomize
