why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
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