I just saw a hot homeless man
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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