I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
