there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
