It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
