I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
