I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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