Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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