we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Randomize