ugly people sure do ruin things
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
