i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
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