Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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