Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Randomize
