Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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